ABOUT THE JC-VERSE: U.N.D.E.R.O.O.

     Merry belated Christmas, ya festive Philberts and Fionas! I hope that the big 12/25 treated each of you to a handsome amount of merriment to carry you through Boxing Day and beyond. Bravo, 2016. You were a little shoddy throughout, but your Christmas was pretty dang swell. Now, with the aid of some page-scrolling and brief finger counting, you'll find that the 12 Creationz of Christmas doesn't seem very finished. 9 posts doesn't exactly equal 12 creationz, so what gives? Well, I originally did plan to do the expected 12 posts. But, as rapid present wrapping for the sis, an early no-peeking Eve bedtime, and the Christmas Day festivities themselves seized my attention, I couldn't manage to squeeze them in. But don't fret, my post-Christmas comrades. Because throughout the entirety of the 12CofC, I was holding a wild card close to my chest. A post I kept pushing off because of how long it had to be. A post that just so happens to include all those drawings of distinguishedly-dressed gents from the torso-up that I promised you guys. And given the number of said drawings it contains, this post has enough certified creations to more than cap off those 12. So, while we may be a day past the deadline, it's time to wrap up this holly jolly jamboree once and for all. Ladies and gents, I give you the latest installment of "About the JC-Verse!" This time, we'll be covering the JC-Verse's most prominent and unconvetional agency, and the thing I've probably mentioned more than anything else on this blog: U.N.D.E.R.O.O.
     So, first off, what exactly is U.N.D.E.R.O.O., besides a government organization that shares its monicer with the underwear that's fun to wear? Well, the agency isn't exactly the type of establishment that you can sum up in a pithy, Twitter-friendly format. It's got a history to behold. But, to start things off easy, let's get into some

                                         TRIVIAL FACTS!

• U.N.D.E.R.O.O. is kind of a big deal. It is the JC-Verse's most powerful and widely-spanning government agency, having its ever-present feelers spread out across the entire globe.
• It was founded in 1902 by high-ranking U.S. general Julius Spyser and accomplished inventor Isaac Jostlewick. (If you want more deets on exactly how that founding went down, I covered it in a post way back in the olden days.)
•  Its purpose is, as originally stated by Jostlewick, "to act as the first line of defense against any mutated, unearthly or otherwise anomalous foe to threaten humankind, and the first to make sense of any instance across the globe that stands out as kooky or bizarre." In other words, if there's something strange in your neighborhood, no need to call Bill Murray and his colorful crew of friends. U.N.D.E.R.O.O.'s got your back.
• U.N.D.E.R.O.O.'s duties are spread out among its 13 divisions: *inhales* Field, Weapons, Tech, Science, Security, Space, Extraterrestrial Communications, Diplomacy, Medical, Fantastical Lifeform Surveillance, Research and Development, Holiday, and Ninja. (Oh, how I wish I was joking about those last two.)
• Ever since its inception, U.N.D.E.R.O.O. has always had two directors jointly running the show. With one rare exception, it's always been the case that one of those directors is from the Spyser family, while the other is from the Jostlewick family. Call it nepotism, call it watered-down monarchy, but after over a hundred years, you can't debate its success.

     With each passing pair of head honchos, U.N.D.E.R.O.O. has seen a very different era of its history, each with its own specific goals and struggles. Some . . . have been better than others. I don't aim to waste too much of your potential boxing time on JC-Verse history class, so I'll try to keep things brief-ish. Let's get into it.

THE "GOLDEN AGE" - ISAAC & JULIUS

     Duration: 1902-1937
     Crud-hits-the-fan-ometer: .5

     Prior to their partnership, Jostlewick and Spyser were the last two guys you'd peg as future life-long partners. To be honest, the only thing the stoic general and eccentric tinkerer had in common was their glorious, mustachioed mugs. But sure enough, in 1902, the duo founded the Universal Network Determining Events of Rather Odd Origins, aiming to do their darnedest to keep the fantastical side of JC-Earth in check and under wraps. Under the two gents' leadership, the organization focused its first 35 years on wrangling the free-roaming mutants left over from the genetic manipulation trend of the steampunk era. U.N.D.E.R.O.O.'s Golden Age also saw a number of snazzy side-projects under Jostlewick's guidance, most notably the creation of the living alloy "Seth" for use against future larger-than-life threats. It was all pretty much blue skies during this era, so I think that's pretty much it.

THE "SILVER AGE" - VERNON & RORY

     Duration: 1939-1965
     Crud-hits-the-fan-ometer: 5

     After Julius' passing in 1937, followed by Isaac's two years later, the reigns of U.N.D.E.R.O.O. were handed over to the pair's respective sons, Rory Spyser and Vernon Jostlewick. Unlike his characteristically stoic pappy and predecessor, Rory was . . . a character. Think Teddy Roosevelt, with a healthy dash of Grunkle Stan from Gravity Falls. The guy did what he wanted to, and when he did it, he did it with unapologetic gusto. So, when the UFO epidemic kicked off with the infamous Roswell crash in 1947, Rory ran headfirst into what would eventually be nicknamed the "UFO Wars." Moving the agency's H.Q. to the newly-built "Honcho House" and its neighboring army base outside D.C., Rory started training agents to take on the so-called "Greys." Meanwhile, his part-time personal conscience Vernon dedicated his time to getting info out of the only (known) Roswell survivor, specimen #0898. Also known as Sheryl. All this wartime hullabaloo didn't amount to much outside of some victories for Rory's men--and a controversial attempt to teleport a crew of cosmonauts to the Grey's home planet in '65. Until . . .

THE "BRONZE AGE" - AL & JONATHAN

   
     Duration: 1967-1982
     Crud-hits-the-fan-ometer: 3.5

     After his personal conscience passed away, Rory was far too up in his years to helm U.N.D.E.R.O.O. all on his own. So, Vernon's kindhearted son Al stepped in as the next Jostlewick director, in order to watch over Rory. After he finally died, Jonathan Spyser joined Al to form the organization's third generation directorial duo. With Rory's gung-ho war efforts having mostly missed the mark, and Vernon's cosmonauts' return looking pretty unlikely, the business-minded new Spyser decided to forge his own path. He concluded that the key to beating out the aliens plaguing the U.S. of A.'s skies and cattle ranches was to turn their focus inward. So, in the years that followed, U.N.D.E.R.O.O. got a makeover. A prep academy was founded to shape youngins into ideal agents, a new Mars teleportation program called Barren I began not even a year after NASA's moon landing, and a brand new agency mascot was introduced. That last one didn't go over too well, but all-in-all, his plans were successful. Things seemed to be going pretty good for Jonathan's "home makeover" method, and the "UFO War" was starting to go in the agency's favor. But alas, call up M. Night Shyamalan because before long, there was a twist. Come 1978, the cosmonauts returned, and gave a more-than-sparkling review of their extended stay at el casa de Grey. This didn't have that much of an affect on Jonathan's game plan, as he fell sick and faced an untimely death soon after in '82. But its repercussions were very much felt in . . .

THE "PLATINUM AGE" - AL & ROBERT

     Duration: 1985-1993
     Crud-hits-the-fan-o-meter: 1

     Half-way through the '80s and going into what would become known as the Platinum Age, U.N.D.E.R.O.O. had a lot of stuff to consider - and they needed a strong new Spyser to help consider them. So, keeping with traditon, Jonathan's son Phil was selected to step up to bat alongside an elderly Al. Unfortunately, Phil just so happened to be a deadbeat, so they went with his son Robert instead. Robert, luckily, was not a deadbeat. In fact, while his bloodline had previously offered up two generals and a businessman, Robert was something decidedly refreshing: a diplomat. And having come of age in the '60s, he was open to a certain philosophy that none of the previous Spysers had considered: peace. Say it with me now, peace. So, inviting a high-ranking group of Greys to Fort Triplock in Nevada, Robert and Al offered up some terms of peace and, through some translator-aided negotiation and firm tridactyl-to-pentadactyl handshakes, made them a reality. Finally, in 1988, the longstanding UFO War came to a close, and U.N.D.E.R.O.O. for the first time started to consider a more hospitable stance on fantastical lifeforms. Yadda yadda, peace on earth, good times all around.

THE "MODERN AGE" - HUGO & ROBERT 

     Duration: 1993-2012
      Crud-hits-the-fan-ometer: .5

     When Al finally passed on, the "Golden Spyser" found his new peace-maintaining partner in Hugo, a genial Jostlewick with a mustache rivaling that of his great-grandpappy. With the unorthodox organization still on good terms with the Greys, thanks to the "Truce at Triplock," efforts started being directed towards dealing with a more varied array of lifeforms, including those like the Hexaplexahedron. The duo began spiffing up the agency's structure for the 21st Century with the introduction of the Security Division and the computerized Fantastical Lifeform Logs. With the exception of a war scare in 2005, in which a certain son-of-a-gun by the name of Smart Alek unsuccessfully tried to conquer Earth (a story for another time, take my word for it), things were pretty calm for the ol' Universal Network Determining Events of Rather Odd Origins. Very calm. Too calm. Because all the while U.N.D.E.R.O.O. was exercising its new role as a global keeper of peace, one leftover lieutenant from Smart Alek's failed army had been locked up, and everyday, was carefully plotting his escape. I wish the Modern Age was where it stopped, folks. I really did. But sure enough . . .

THE "DARK AGE" - ROBERT AND THE MAN


      Duration: 2012-present
      Crud-hits-the-fan-o-meter: 10

    Once the stray lieutenant got to Hugo, he had him killed. I won't go into how for the sake of not tainting any of the holly jolly seasonal spirit you've still got in you, but as you can probably gather, it wasn't pretty. With Jostlewick out of the way, the lieutenant approached Robert with a proposition. He wanted to rule, and he was pretty darn sure that the Golden Spyser wanted to live. He was right to assume that much. Because, when he was offered a choice of the realization of both of those wishes or neither, Robert chose the former. That lieutenant was named Bikar'Lek of Glimmorrius, and starting in 2012, he has been the one and only true director of U.N.D.E.R.O.O. With Robert as his powerless public puppet, he has dedicated his rule over the agency to conquering the JC-Verse, using the guise of Project Doorway to achieve his fallen master's vision one planet at a time. And with such a wicked goal for his government power, there's only one title that really suits him. Not director. Not watered-down monarch. But "the Man."


     Well, I think that's more than enough JC-Verse history class for one day. I feel kinda bad ending this session on such a grim note. Just know that things do eventually work out for the unorthodox agency. I'll stay mum for now on how exactly that happens, just in case I ever want to adapt U.N.D.E.R.O.O. into an animated series or something of the like. But regardless, it happens. It's not a quick process, but it happens. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed the 12 Creationz of Christmas! It didn't exactly go as planned, but to heck with that! Here at Jacob's Characterz! we never give up. And if not giving up requires me to write the last post of the 12CofC on and off on Christmas Day until 3 AM and post it on Boxing Day, that's what I've gotta do. And that's exactly what I did. Don't worry, I slept in until past noon, so I made up for it. I hope you all had a fantastic December celebrating what it is that you celebrate, take care, and I'll see you in 2017! Hasta la pasta!

AMAZING FANTASY #15 (REDUX)

     Speaking of tending to the loose threads dangling from this blog, I give you the Jacob's Characterz!-brand rendition of the cover of Amazing Fantasy #15, AKA the first appearence of your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man! Back when I redid the Fantastic Four #1 cover, I promised that two more fancy-shamncy redesigns of the like were on their way. Today, albeit a bit late, seemed like as good a time as any to deliver on the first 50% of that promise. Plus, that good ol' Homecoming trailer just dropped recently-ish, so . . . relevance? Yes? No? Maybe so? I dunno, but it was still worth the ink. Enjoy, fellow Marvelites!

RIGHTING WRONGS: the TyrannoThesaurus Rex

      Ho ho ho and into the second half of the 12 Creationz of Christmas we go. Apologies that this one got a little delayed. Last night I had to shut off the computer while prepping it so that I could countinue binging Over the Garden Wall for the first time with the ol' mumsy. From now on, the Mustache Ninja and I can freely engage in lively renditions of "Potatoes and Molasses" with Mom in on the loop. That could either be a good thing or a bad thing, now that I think about it, so I'll keep you posted. Now, onto the delayed creation at hand. Devoted passengers of the Primo Blogger-Based Animation Crazy Train of Southern California™  that you see before you will likely find that drawing below awful familiar. Allow me to explain. As I've mentioned before, for as long as I can remember I've been receiving mentorship on my posts from a guy by the name of J.K. Riki. He's an animator working out of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and he's offered a ton of help over the years, telling me what he likes about certain drawings and giving me constructive feedback on how to make them better. He even thought I was noteworthy enough to warrant a post on his site, which was amazing. But while I have taken his critiques and done what he's suggested plenty of times, I've managed to let some of them slip through the cracks. The guy's been so kind over the years that I'd feel bad if I just let those critiques be lost to the blogospherical mysts of time . . . time . . . time.  So, after a bazillion years, I'm finally going to start tending to those lost tidbits of feedback and doing what he suggested, starting with character #165: the TyrannoThesaurus Rex! On this one, he thought it would be interesting if I ixnayed the exterior line and made the literate lizard entirely of words, so here you go. Fully realized and rendered to the hilt. Hope you like it, J.K.!

Version 2.0

Version 1.0

IN WHICH JACOB SHOWS OFF HIS SISTER'S PARTY-PLANNING PROWESS

     Sharing is caring, friends. And since my 15th birthday and corresponding pre-birthday birthday extravaganza just went down this week, I've decided to live by that rhyming truth of life and expand the 12 Creationz of Christmas' borders to include the work of said party's planner. Also known as my sister. She did an all-around knockout job this year, and given the fact that I got to post the decorations I made for her party, it's only fair that she gets the same treatment. Enjoy! (PS, the theme was "Jacob-Con," by the by. A pretty dang clever way to tie together the grandiose hodgepodge of obscurity and geekdom that is my interests.)

(a spiffy sign)

(a Gravity Falls-themed cake, made entirely by the sis)

(an Over the Garden Wall-themed pin-the-tail game)

(the sensational sibs themselves)

#267: The Winter Soulstress

     I am now 15 years old! *zealous confetti-ing* *smashes plate* That's a pretty whopping development in itself, but get this: once the numbers are sufficiently crunched, you'll find that I've been running this blog for over one-fifth of my life! I'm also about five-sixths of the way to starting college and making/breaking my adult animation career, so it's crunch time, folks. Anyway, sorry for not posting the ♪6th Creation of Christmas♪ on Sunday while I was enjoying my pre-birthday birthday shindig. But we've still got a good 5-ish days until the big 'Mas and the 12CoC's epic climax, so I'll make sure to balance things out by then. Now, onto the post! Ladies and gents, the first character post of the 12 Creationz of Christmas: the Winter Soulstress! Super alpaca points to anyone who noticed and appreciates the lowkey punnyness of that name, but if you aren't one such person, fear not. This character goes deeper than just some snappy paronomasia. Of all the abnormal and eye-raising locales on JC-Earth, there is one in particular that's managed to thouroughly cement itself in myth, and for good reason: Jästus Ridge. The snowy Finnish mountainside has seen a bus load of eager explorers visiting over the years--but few leaving. This could be attributed to your textbook geologic hazard, but par for the course with the JC-Verse, the truth is much, much stranger. Jästus Ridge just so happens to be the home of the legendary, and ridiculously dangerous, Winter Soulstress! Originally a curious young witch born in the Middle Ages, she broke a colossal taboo by falling for a non-mage at the age of 16. Enraged, the elder witches and warlocks had her lover sentenced to death, and cast her out into the icy slopes of Jästus Ridge, assuming her a surefire gonner. Unfortunately for them, they did some serious underestimating. With nothing to loose, the heartbroken young witch eventually stumbled into another taboo practice: soulsnatching. This brand of magic allows any experienced witch or warlock to suck the very spirit out of another living thing, and harness its life energy to, if they play their cards right, live forever. And with hikers trekking now and then across the treacherous Ridge, she had enough souls at her disposal to give it a go. So, the young witch became the Winter Soulstress, luring strapping and unsuspecting explorers into her icy clutches and stockpiling their souls, sustaining her life century after century. (*inhales and exhales* Nothing like a good ol'-fashioned mystical European death mistress to get you in the spirit.)

(Version with more details coming soon (maybe))

THE AFOREMENTIONED SNAZZY LOGO

     I present to you the official logo for the 12 Creationz of Christmas! I initially planned to just add this puppy to the announcement post and fill today's spot with a certain character I've been planning, but things got a little off-track. Plus, considering the surprising amount of time it took to get the logo prepped and postable, I reckon it's as much a certified creation as any. Gentlemen, bring in the stamp! *stamps*

CLICK TO ENLARGE

FAN ART O'CLOCK (again) feat. Green Lantern (again)

     ♪For the 3rd Creation of Christmas, Jacob gave to me some heavily obscure DC fanart.♪ The lyrics could use a little finetuning, but they ring true nonetheless. It's fanart time once again! For the comic book casuals out there who may or may not be confuzzled right now, no, I didn't take some serious creative liberties in making this fanart. This is the incredibly old, incredibly different Green Lantern of the 1940s, AKA Alan Scott. Instead of policing extraterrestrials, this fella ran around with a dog and a portly cab driver, fighting giant swamp zombies and sky pirates. So, all-in-all, nothing new for this blog. Behold!

(by the by, that's Alan Tudyk as Alan Scott. Alanception, I guess. *Twilight Zone music*)

NOTEWORTHY THINGS

     Time for day #2! Well, technically still day #1, on account of the fact that I published the first day's post after midnight, but . . . you know, semantics. Anywho, since all the king-sized posts are currently scheduled for once I'm liberated from the shackles of schoolwork for three weeks starting Saturday, this one's gonna be pretty brief. But it's an important post nonetheless. Anyone by any chance wondering where the heck I was for the umpteen days after Characterfest? To be fair, it's not exactly a big "egad" moment anymore when I randomly vanish from the blog for a week or two--nothing will ever hold a candle to the Great "Oh Crud, I Haven't Posted in Six Months" Incident of '13--but some sufficiently noteworthy stuff occurred while I was away. Not even counting the Spider-Man Homecoming trailer. Which I'm gonna try not to start ranting about. *puts brain in a chokehold*

NOTEWORTHY THINGS

• I worked on the stage crew for my school's talent show. My school is basically a public school/homeschool hybrid, and I've done most of my schooling on the latter half of that combo since day one. Now that I'm in high school, I'm finally shedding my unofficial "official school hermit" image and getting familiar with the former half. It's been going pretty dandy so far.
• I saw Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them and Doctor Strange. November was apparently the month of New-York-based sorcerors in blue coats, not that I'm complaining. 1.8 out of 2 thumbs up.
•  I low-key mastered the skill of efficiently drawing snappily-dresssed older dudes from the torso up in large quantities, as you'll be seeing soon enough. Like I said, the king-sized posts are on their way.
• I continued un-hermit-izing myself by going to Teen Movie Night at my school last Friday. I got to watch Elf again, which I always consider a plus, given the fact that Buddy is my internal self, externalized.
• Lastly, this weekend I threw my accomplice/sister/on-hand representative of the fangirl populous Abby (AKA the Mustache Ninja) her Hamilton-themed birthday party. Throwing each other's birthday parties is an age-old tradition betwen the two of us. Our birthdays are 12 days apart, so December is essentially the Annual Housewide Birthday-Planning Championship for us. It would kinda be betraying the basic purpose of the 12 Creationz of Christmas if I left this post without something that qualifies as a creation. So, to fill that void, here are the half-and-half character headshots I made as decorations for the party. All-in-all, I think they turned out pretty snazzy. Enjoy!

  

  Alexander Hamilton

  
  

  

  Aaron Burr

  

  Eliza Schuyler

  

  Angelica Schuyler

  

  Peggy Schuyler

  

  John Laurens

  

  Lafayette

  

  Hercules Mulligan (with the decidedly slyest grin ever)

  
  

  

  George Washington

  

  Thomas Jefferson

  

  James Madison

  

  A very distraught King George

  
  

MARVEL EARTH 600 5: BETTER LATE THAN NEVER

     Alright, jolly ranchers. It's 12 Creationz of Christmas time. And to start things off I'm resurrecting an oldie. For those of you who weren't keeping tabs on this blog a bazillion years ago, Marvel Earth 600 was a headcanon that I created and posted about in detail a total of 4 times. It's basically the Marvel Universe, but every character has been flipped on their respective head. Click on this link if you want to dive into the depths of Archiveville and read those original four. But for now, without further ado, let's get into the Earth-600-ing of the character I promised all those eons ago that I would do next . . .

• Matt Murdock: after getting caught in the devistating crosshairs of a chemical spill, lawyer Matt Murdock was left blinded, burned, and teetering on the precipice of passing on. And given his moral choices so far, things weren't looking so good regarding where he'd be passing onto. But something shone upon him that day. A glorious, glowing being. It stood at the foot of his hospital bed, offering him a literally life-saving deal and a firm handshake to seal it. He accepted in a heartbeat. The only problem was, that being glowed red. And Matt Murdock had just given over his soul to a being known to some as Satan, to some as Mephisto, but who chooses to call himself "the Beast". Only unlike in the case of our pal Ghost Rider, Matt Murdock wasn't forced to run around settling scores on the devil's behalf. Instead, he was given two things: horns, and a watch. Two hideous horns, and a crimson-tinted watch that ticked and ticked and ticked down to the day he would 100% truly die. And every day Murdock continued living his newly restored life, those two things would remind him of what he had agreed to: that no matter what he did to change, once he finally passed on, his soul would contractually land in the hands of his putrid partner for eternity. There was nothing that ol' Matt could do at this point. So, luckily, he got some significant help. Taking pity on the poor lawyer and knowing the untapped potential that his soul was endowed with, an angelic being known soley as "Stick" was sent to recrute him into the earthly ranks of the "One-Above-All;" to allow him to fight alongside the angels against the fallen beings hat lurk among the living; to allow Murdock to maybe, just maybe find redemption and rid himself of the terrible debt he owes in the afterlife. So, just as desperate to reclaim his life as he had once been to save it, he said yes. Equipped a pair of battons embowed with holy energy, Murdock fights alongside Stick in the war against the dark spirits of Earth 600, as well as the Beast's human followers (known by the moniker of "the Hand")--and all the while working to once and for all save his soul. (Should I try to tie this post into Christmas? Should I make that connection? I dunno, it's past midnight and I'm too tired to function. You get the jist. Angels and all that good stuff.)

FESTIVE FESTIVITIES (Feat. An Announcement)

     Greetings and salu-stinking-tations, everybody! Look at that. Almost a week since the first Spider-Man Homecoming trailer and pigs are not yet flying, nor has H.E.Doublehockeysticks frozen over. The prophecies were wrong. Also, I didn't internally combust into flames upon first viewing, so, personal victory. Oh yeah, by the by, it's Christmastime!

And with this particular Christmas comes a stark realization. I've been the engineer of this cartoon crazy train for almost 4 years now. And in 2 out of those 4-ish years, I've celebrated December packing this blog to the brim with my own "12 Characterz of Christmas." It's been a pretty socko endeavor both go-rounds, if I do say so myself. But that being said, 24 characters is a lot. And there are only so many that you can make out of festive puns. So, to avoid having to scrape the bottom of of the merry barrel this holiday season, I've decided to significantly widen the gambit. Ladies and gents, put your hands and hooves together and welcome to JC tradition the 12 Creationz of Christmas! (Gone with the z branding this far, I've gotta commit.) Leading up to the big 12-25, you folks will be getting a brand new post *almost* everyday--only this time, those slots could be filled with anything. Fanart, fan theories, "About the JC-Verse" posts, even animation! Sometimes festive, sometimes whatever the heck pops into my head. Any genre of post this here blog has ever hosted is up for grabs--and it all kicks off tomorrow. It's gonna be holly. It's gonna be jolly. And if neither of those things, it'll at least be gosh dang weird.

(P.S. forgive this post for its temporary lack of an official "12 Creationz of Christmas" snazzy logo. One will be added soon enough. Please stand by.)