#128: Anticape

Sorry, guys! I could not apologize enough. I did not know about International Animation Day until it was over, but I will try to make up for it with some Walt. "Animation can explain whatever the mind of man can conceive" -Walt Disney. Or in this case, the mind of 12-year-old. Speaking of, here's my new character: Anticape! I've told you of the 2014 Super Little Cape, I told you of the 1980s Super Little Cape, now I tell you the unfortunate tale of Rider Zain, the 1960s Super Little Cape. I know the '60s is usually the decade of which we try to forget, but this is important. Once simply an orphan from Pizeezle, California, Zain came upon the mystic cape when it shot through his window and clonked him in the thinker. Once he came back to consciousness, he accepted the job. But unfortunately, the cape can make you a superhero, but it can't make you a good guy. After using his powers to severely hurt a group of robbers, he was stripped of his cape and went kookoo-bananas. Now using a duplicate cape called Darkgarment, he has declared war on all future Super Little Capes and has become the raging fiend Anticape! Phew! Great Master Yoda's ghost, that was a mouthful. Well, post-full.  

BAD-OFF: ROUND IV

Congrats to the elastic ol' bean, the Impossible, for winning the latest BAD-OFF! Now, he takes on Griefer: 8-bit baddy and foe of SkyStar. All of us who've sat for millennia attempting and failing to win the boss battle on a video game feel ya, Impossible. We feel ya.

                          CLICK TO ENLARGE

#127: Ozbald of Wuzzlemoo

I'd like to first point out that the idea for the following character is brought to you courtesy of my purple-clad, 5th-grade oddity of a friend, Sophie. Ladies and gentlemen, Ozbald of Wuzzlemoo! Amongst the rolling mauve hills and rubbery flora of the distant planet Wuzzlemoo, you would assume things couldn't get any weirder. Then you look down. And you realize a tiny blonde Wuzzlemese fellow is curiously poking away at your foot with his tiny staff. That, my friend, is Ozbald. Living among his fellow Wuzzlemesians in a large hollow tree, the blue chief wanders around, gathering food and items for his people and sporting the latest in trashed NASA technology on his staff. (Read post #72 and you will perfectly understand how such a strange creation could come out of Sophie's head.)

"LOOK SIR, DROIDS!"

I met a few celebs today...

#126: SkyStarreo

Okay, here's my new(ish) character: SkyStarreo! For the time when the console game crusader SkyStar was fighting the Doom Lord ZOO'OZ with the Mythlihood, the good avatars of the Virtuality assumed he had been ixnayed. So, for SkyStar's best buddy, Areo, this meant someone had to slap on that suit and carry on the persona like Avi would've wanted. And SkyStarreo was born. But as most of you probably know from Nickelodeon's Planet Sheen, giving the comic relief the role of protagonist is never successful. Equipped with highly advanced tech and just about as much knowledge of how to use it as a stereotypical TV-show parent, he flew through the pixelated skies as Avi's anime replacement. That's right, people. He Bucky Barns'd it.

#125: Super Little Cape (1988)

Now that I've stopped listening to to the catchiness of Panic! At The Disco - "Ready 2 Go" from The Smurfs for the bazillionth time, I will post a new character: Super Little Cape! I know. Déjà vu. But what I didn't tell you in #124: Super Little Cape is that Dean Zeckler was not the first person to dawn the small, super-powered costume accessory. In fact, for over 1,000 years, the Cape has been past down by various wearers to fight evil in various galaxies and dimensions. It just so happens that today, we'll learn of wearer #12, Theo P. Binson. Yeah, people. He's from the '80s. Back in said super rad decade, Binson was feeling like the biggest loser at Leroy Academy. But that ol' fun-sized garment has a way of finding people who sure as heck need it. After being chosen, Binson slapped on that cape and began defending New York (it's always New York) with his totally tubular powers and excellent purple do. He actually had to save the life of my previous character Fresh McCoy once. Fresh did the robot in front of a real robot. Groups were offended, lazers were shot and afros were fried.

#124: Super Little Cape

Yesterday was my mom's side's family reunion. I got new blog fans out of my cousin Zach and Uncle Matt, ate some rocking pizza dip, got a random lecture from my Aunt Marlene on the dangers of tattoos, and got a bunch of cheesy My Little Pony songs stuck in my head thanks to my cousin Kate. I call the day an overall win. Anyhow, here's my new character: Super Little Cape! Who is he, you ask? A superhero with a little cape. Imagine that. But not just any superhero with a little cape. He's Dean Zeckler, scrawny 8th grader and indubitably mild-mannered resident of Philly. But that all changed one day when he was given a mystical cape from a balding stranger, turning him into a high-powered fighter of do-badders! Now, he is the boy, the myth, the little-garment legend... Super Little Cape! (I actually came up with this character when I was about 8. It's Throwback Thursday, yo! But, you know. On a Sunday.)

STRAIGHT FROM THE JC-VERSE #11

   (#118, 2014.)

#123: Virus

I have been personally waiting for a post with this production number. Sometimes, you just gotta enjoy the simple things. Now, here's my new character: Virus! At a point, everything was hunky-dory in the world of the Virtuality. Both sides were at peace, SkyStar was realm-famous, Griefer was long-gone and comic relief Areo was enjoying the luxurious life of being famous by association. Then, family came to town. That's right, the snarling glowing avatar you see below is Jaskle Tanaru, SkyStar's brother whether he likes it or not. Coming from the same code as Avi with the addition of wanting to destroy the Virtuality as we know it, he is truly the most perfectly-matched foe of the console game crusader. Other nicknames for him include glow-stick, neon nuisance, blue screen of death, so-on and so-forth and what have you.

#122: Grand Ronacc: The Avatar with a Clipboard

I am totally geeking out over the LEGO Batman film coming out in 2017! There's just something about that hilariously egotistical DC minifigure that the world can't get enough of. The rise of the LEGO Cinematic Universe is upon us and I love it. Anyway, time for my new character: Grand Ronacc. It wasn't long ago that I posted #118: Emperor N00by. Well, considering what I've told you of him, it's obvious some poor avatar has to take on the job of talking some sense into the guy. Well, some poor avatar did. His name is Ronacc. (Oddly enough, it's a very common name in the Virtuality. Even odder, they consider John off the rails.) Always with a clipboard in hand and a mustache on face, the sensible shorty has been the servant and - not so successful - conscience of N00by for over a hundred years (which perfectly explains where all Ronacc's hair went.) I have personally cast The Princess Bride's Wallace Shawn as his voice actor in my head. Inconceivable!!!

#121: Griefer

Now that I'm done totally geeking out over the new Tomorrowland trailer, here's my new character: Griefer, property of the world of SkyStar. There's not a whole lot I can tell you about this guy, I don't want to spoil the SkyStar movie coming in about, say, 30 years. I'll just hit the important points. It's obvious there's something missing from the story of the Virtuality. No, not Mario, he's fashionably late, part of the norm. I'm talking about a villain, and I'm pretty sure a monstrosity such as this would suffice. Having fallen into an unstable underground cesspool of pixels called the BetaZone, the avatar Benzer was forever bonded with said pixels he fell into. Now able to control the "Beta-layer" surrounding him with his thoughts (like changing the color to black so it would be more slimming), Griefer became the most frightening -uh- thing in the whole Virtuality, loving to deceive and play twisted games. If you tossed Venom and Pacman in a blender, the outcome would be very similar to this guy.

#120: Vacuum Jack and the Immorvis

My sister is convinced that the following drawing looks like Catfish from Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja. I encourage you to get a picture of Catfish and compare the two side by side, just to see how far off a comment that is. Now, here is said character: Vacuum Jack and the Immorvis! (Not to be confused with #34: The Dark Vacuum of Space.) Picture yourself decimex (JC-Verse word for a reeeeeally long distance) away. Now picture being on a planet, maybe something resembling Tatooine if you're feeling force-y, and everything at the moment is calm. Then BAM. Truck driver-esque extraterrestrial sucks up your galaxy. Unfortunately, many a planet have suffered that sucky fate due to a guy named Vacuum Jack. Armed with an otherworldly blue force called the Immorvis, capable of devouring whole decimex-worth of the final frontier, he is literally the most dastardly, feared, threatening criminal in all the JC-Verse. Eat your heart out, Capone. (PS, I'll have to thank Stephen Hawking and his talk of the God Particle sucking up the galaxy for this one.)

#119: King Arcadus

One month until Big Hero 6!!! Whatever the name for the populous of Big Hero 6 uberfans is, I'm their president. Baymax Brigade maybe. I'll have to coin that. Anyway, here's my new character: King Arcadus! I already fully introduced you to the the Digital Domain and their incompetent goateed emperor, now I feel it mandatory to tell you about the big pixelated society to the right. The 8-Bit Kingdom. Brightly-colored, fuzzy and chock-full of centipedes and space invaders, the place needs someone to keep it in check. Ladies and gentlereaders, Howell Arcadus, holder of power and wearer of beard. Equipped with an exclamation point staff and a pair of Ozzy Osbourne-style bifocals, he has ruled the kingdom for over 500 years. He also has a very distinct smell of data and lemon flavor power-ups (a few may have gotten stuck his beard).

#118: Emperor N00by

Time for my newest installment in the world of SkyStar: Emperor N00by! In the gamer world called the Virtuality, where angry birds swoop across the skies and road signs read "FROGGER XING," the land is split into two warring halves: Digital Domain and 8-Bit Kingdom. The 8-Bits get King Arcadus, a wise ruler with much experience and an epic Dumbledore beard. The Digitals? Yeah. They get N00by. As full of himself as Pacman is of power pellets, the new-school bit-wit always gets what he wants when he wants, whether it's a cold pixel bath or new goatee gel (he prefers the brand Stiff Under Lip).